Animal Chronicles
The Inevitable Sweet & Sad Journey
by Sheri Cardo
We all walk down this road at some point. If we’re lucky, our beloved animal companion will have lived to a ripe old age before we set off together on his or her final journey. It’s a tough road because there are few signposts, almost no directions, and confusing twists and turns. But by walking beside our faithful friends and helping them endure whatever is their fate, we prepare our hearts to heal eventually from what is, to most people, a brutally painful loss.
The process of death isn’t spoken of much in our society so the reality is that each of us approaches it through trial and error — blazing our own haphazard trail, as it were. But there are some resources to help pet guardians and it’s important to know what they are well in advance of needing them. The first is a well-established relationship with a vet you and your pet both like and trust.
When my dog Honey suffered the seizure that marked the beginning of her final six weeks, I relied on my veterinarian to be my touchstone — to help me keep in perspective what was reasonable based on what she knew of me, Honey and Honey’s medical condition. When you’re faced with a major medical issue, you become acutely aware that medicine is an art, not a science, and that being the case, very few decisions are clear cut. You have to know your pet and you have to have a vet you can trust.
For me, there was only one thing that I was sure of during those final weeks: I didn’t want Honey to have even one bad day. The moment I felt she was suffering and there wasn’t a viable remedy, I would ask my vet to come to the house and humanely euthanize her. Pretty quickly, we had made the decision not to treat the cancer we had found except with prednisone and pain relief. If she’d been five years old — or even 10 — and diagnosed with cancer, we would have pulled out all the stops. But at 16, after as good a life as any dog could have, we weren’t going to put her through invasive biopsies and uncomfortable treatments. ‘No suffering’ was our bottom line and we stuck to it for Honey — sometimes in the face of mildly disapproving specialists. It’s important to know what you will and will not do, and to prepare to be your pet’s advocate. They need us to be strong at this time.
Making the decision to provide palliative care rather than treat the cancer thrust us into hospice mode — and one of the surprising things we learned was that death is not a quick process. It works on its own timetable and weeks went by while Honey remained stable and enjoyed her life, albeit in a more restrained manner. During those weeks, we juggled her medications, enticed her with new foods and made her the very center of our world. Having shared her home with several other pets, she thrived on all of the extra attention and I believe it nourished her like nothing else.
Providing hospice care presents its own challenges. At some point, the very act of taking your pet to the vet is going to be too uncomfortable for them, and we simply stopped doing it. We were fortunate that our vets all supported this decision and worked with us to get Honey the care she still needed: by consulting over the phone and teaching us how to adhere pain patches. But how much better would it have been to have had veterinary home care available? Since only mobile vet practices are equipped to do this, establishing a relationship with a mobile vet when confronted with this situation might be a reasonable course of action.
While we were prepared to help Honey out of this life when it seemed right for her, many people feel just as strongly that they want their pet to die naturally. It is very much a personal decision based on a family’s beliefs and caretaking abilities, as well as the individual animal’s condition. According to Todd Czarnecki, DVM, of Tender Care Veterinary Hospital in San Rafael, “Our animals help us learn about death and dying. They have so much to teach us about getting every ounce out of this life.” For clients who want to experience being with their animals through a natural death, he says, “I do my best to support them and hold their hand through it. Animals are very unique and some are just incredibly beautiful in their dying process.” (Read about Cruz the cat on the next page.)
For many people, he explains, it is very difficult for them to determine whether their animal is suffering. “People doubt themselves,” says Dr. Czarnecki, “and they’re afraid that their pet is in pain. There is a huge place in my heart where I feel that the time an older animal has is a valuable experience for them and their family, and I try to help people not make decisions from a place of fear. At the same time, if I feel an animal is suffering or if it’s very bad, I’ll definitely bring up euthanasia.”
Last summer, Myrna Milani, DVM, an expert on the human-companion animal bond, spoke at The Marin Humane Society and a member of the audience asked her how a person can know when it’s time to let their pet go. “If the bond is there, you will know it,” said Dr. Milani, and I can hardly type these words without tearing up because I know them to be true.
Sheri Cardo is the MHS public information director.
